I want to carry on with my life, but I hate how I look. If only I could look good, I could learn to love myself. I use foundation to hide my spots and scars but, admittedly, more so to hide my face from others. Please help.

Your discomfort with how you look may be brought about by unresolved negative emotions. You've got to work on relating to those emotions so you can cease to hate the way you look. Although you can't destroy emotions -- they're always there and part of who you are -- you can deal with them creatively. Confronting your emotions will help you accept your individual "you-ness," including your looks, which are perfect as they are anyway. If you can't see your own beauty, you may want to find a counselor or therapist to help you work through your emotions. In the meantime, I can offer these makeup tips:

  • Makeup is an enhancer and sometimes a practical tool. It's also a delight, not a mask to hide you from the world. The world needs to see you. Use makeup conservatively and only in the areas needed. For example, if you have blemishes, discoloration or scars you wish to conceal, apply directly to the area, not to the entire face.
    • Start by finding a well-lit store with a friendly environment, and have a staff makeup artist match a suitable foundation to your skin tone. One of my favorite lines is Shu Uemura Nobara Cream Foundation, a foundation and concealer in one that gives smooth, natural coverage. And for the more confounding spots, scars, vitiligo, etc., I recommend Derma-Color by Kryolan.
      • If you have an oily complexion, choose a foundation color a trace lighter than your skin tone, as oil darkens the tone.
      • Go easy on face powder -- too much creates a drying, unflattering texture.
      • Don't forget to treat your skin especially well. If it's in your budget, treat yourself to a facial; aside from the deep cleaning and exfoliating aspects, the hands-on touch of an experienced esthetician is deeply soothing. I recently had a microdermabrasion facial at the recommendation of my dermatologist, where my skin was gently exfoliated with micro-crystals; the results were dramatic, and my skin feels like buttermilk.
      • If a facial is out of your budget, turn to the gamut of amazing products that you can use at home, as listed below.

      In closing, I wish you love on your journey to discovering the singular, amazing individual you are.

    July 05, 2007